Five Nights at Freddy's: The Bite of '87 (Script)

  • Freddy Fazbear (Mr. CreepyPasta): Hey, all you pirate fans! Head on down- head on down, down, down to the Pirate Cove, 'cuz the show's about to s-tttttart! It's our good ol' pal Foxy. Foooooooxyyyyyy? ("Never accepts me.") I know he's around here somewhere. ("Always alone.") W-we need to call him out! Foxy?? ("Not one of them!") Help me out, kids. Foxy?! ("Leave them!") One last time kids, nice and loud, so we can get him out here. FOXY!
  • Pirate Cove Foxy (WellHeyProductions): Yarrrrrrrr! Hello, it's me Foxy, and welcome-welcome-welcome to the Pirate's Cove. Freddy best be getting back on stage, or I'll be forced to make him ("gut the pig {?}") -forced to make him walk the plank.
  • Freddy: (laughs) Have fun kids, and let's ("KILL THEM!") keep ourselves safe when exploring Pirate's Cove!
  • Foxy: Ye best be getting back, landlubber, for these little ones are now part of the Pirate crew. For when you're in the Pirate Cove, remember to venture safe. And noooooo runnin' around the Cove, or else ye be ("lost forever")- be walking the plank. Is it swashbuckling adventure that ye be seeking lads? Or is it ("You don't belong here") yer not akin to the seven seas? All pirates give me an Arrrrrrrrr! ("Please help me...") Arrrrrrrr, hehehe! I see ye all be walking around with your pizza in hand and yer sodie pops like true pirates. And what do we sea pirates do? Why, we sing ourselves a sea shanty. (begins to sing) Ohhhhhhh, w-what do you do with the drunken s-sailor? What do you do with the drunken sailor? What do you do with the drun-k-k-ken sailor early in the morn'? Put him in the longboat 'til he's sober...
  • Young Girl (DeadJosey): (as Foxy sings) Mommy, look! The Fox is weird! It has a hook for a hand!
  • Mother (Creepy-Rainbow-Pasta): (uninterested) That's nice dear.
  • Manager (Litterbot): Little girl, you shouldn't be climbing around Foxy like that.
  • Young Girl: You're not my mom! You can't tell me what to do!
  • Foxy: {whispers whilst singing} Not in control... {starts to break down}
  • Manager: Ma'am, please tell your daughter to get away from Foxy.
  • Mother: She's not hurting anyone. If she wants to play with the Fox then let her play with the Fox.
  • Foxy: {louder} NOT IN CONTROL!
  • Young Girl: Look at its funny mouth, it's so stupid looking! Hahaha- (Foxy bites into the girl's head, and severs the frontal lobe of her brain. She falls over in a dead faint, as the crowd panics)
  • Manager: (as Les Toreadors plays and crowd screams in horror) Oh God, oh my God... (crowd's horrified screams fade out as song continues, before song fades into silence)